Traveling Guide to Adaptive Behavior: Input Wanted!

My husband is in Prague on business. My in-laws, in Athens, are asking for our help to invest some very-needed cash in the US market. We are waiting for a head-hunter (oops, sorry, "executive recruiter") to get back to us on a position in Scotland and another based here in LA. And today I read an article which tipped my scale in terms of "urban nomad-ness" and really made me laugh:  UBS has announced that it will allow its employees to veer from its previous standard recommendation of wearing "beige" undergarments to "allow" colors, including "red."

Really? Yup. The 157-year-old banking institution UBS has a history of providing detailed advice for its employees, which numbered 65,000 worldwide at the end of 2009. A handbook for bank trainees gives a country-by-country behavior guide.

In Russia, it tells employees to be prepared to hold your drink at business engagements and to "never reject an invitation to the sauna."

In Latin America, "turning up before an appointment might even be considered rude."

And in the United States, it says, "never criticize the President."

So I've decided to begin collecting notes on the "Traveling Urban Nomad's Guide to Adaptive Behavior." In other words, how to not screw your chances with clients, potential clients, new friends and even family.

Send me any thought, comments, funny experiences. I want to know more…like these:

In Hungary, it is frowned upon to smile at strangers. Why? They believe it is a sign of shiftiness, a sign of the "con." No influencing people with a winning smile there. Nope. It's the "monotone" that works well. Also, be very careful when making toasts with new clients as the saying for "To your health" is but a syllable away from "Up your a…" Magyars think it's particularly funny to trip you up on that one!

In Greece, if you need a taxi or are waving to a friend across the street, for heaven's sake do not put all five fingers up and wave them toward the person you want to attract. It means something similar to go do something nasty to themeslves…well it starts in English with an "f"…I think you get the picture.

Learn when to shake hands, with whom you can shakes hands, when shaking hands will cause a diplomatic incident. There are countries where it is appropriate to kiss a pig's butt, share the blood of an ox, even eat the brains of a monkey. But whatever you do in India, forget giving a gift made from a cow's hide!

So, please, dig deep. I want to know what cultural bloopers you've made!

OMG…The Future is in my Living Room!

OMG! The future is here and now and is hanging on my wall in the form of a Panasonic television screen equipped with VieraCast!  What, you ask?  High def viewing combined with the power of the Internet, wild sound, a camera and the likes of SKYPE, Twitter, Netflix, Amazon Movies (did you even know they had a competitive service to Netflix??), Weather.com, Pandora radio, Picasa photos, assorted channels from Germany (yes, Germany, although I am in Pasadena, California) and all of my 500 channels from AT&T/U-verse. All this on the clearest, crispest plasma screen I've ever seen!

I am wowed. I can't wait to see what other services they have in store for us that are "coming soon."

All you need is an electric connection, Internet access and either your digital box for free television channels or a connection to a programming distribution service. VieraCast is a smart TV platform brought to us by Panasonic that makes it possible to stream multimedia content from the Internet directly into select  televisions. Maybe this is the return of family viewing. The return of families sitting around the TV, together. 


My husband and I did something we haven't done in years -- we actually danced and sang the night away, in our living room. We went to Pandora and set up our favorite, personal radio stations, choosing our favorite songs  so that Pandora's computer software could psycho-select our stations for us! It reminded me of so many nights my sisters and I would put on records and dance while my parents watched, shaking their heads but inwardly appreciating the beat as we moved our hips and threw up our arms like chimps and had a great, shared time.


If you haven't yet gotten all your holiday gifts, this is one to consider! Ours cost us under $800 and has already given us hours of fun.
Happy Holidays to all!

Feeling Empty or Full This Year?

As we approach the end of 2010, we bid adieu to our first decade of this, the twenty-first century. And guess what, folks? WE MADE IT!  I guess that goes into the “full” category. My husband and I met ten years ago this month, so the magic of this past decade has not been lost on us. We made it this far. Yippee!

In no order of importance, this year has had its ups, downs and wacky turnarounds.

We remain in our town of South Pasadena, the home of the South Pas Tigers. Ten minutes from downtown LA. Thirty minutes from the Pacific. Fifteen minutes to the San Gabriel Mountains. Former home of the Ostrich Farm, where strippers from the 20s to 40s could find their plumes for coverage.

Our youngest, Michael, now a Senator at his elementary school, turns eight in January and is more convinced than ever that the elections of 2044 will be his year to get to the White House. It’s not too early to put your contributions aside for the first Jewish-Greek-American President. We’ll be counting on you. We know where you live.

Alex, our twenty-something son, has moved to hip Atwater Village where he and the lovely Andrea share a one-bedroom apartment that combines mid-century kitsch (think bobble heads of The Monkees on a shelf in a room with an Eames-like chair) with up to date electronics and very powerful speakers. He remains happily employed with thoughts of academia a fading memory from his past.

I, on the other hand, am thinking of turning to academia more and more. Professor Davis has a nice ring…But maybe not, as I have just gotten notice that I now qualify for my fourth (yes fourth!) federal extension to receive unemployment benefits, approved by President Obama. It was automatically filed on my behalf, as it was for the other millions of folks who have been downsized, marginalized, penalized and otherwise life-jeopardized since 2008. I can’t afford a low-paying job like teaching, when the Federal government continues to bail me out.

My better half, Nick, who began the year thinking we would be ending it in Prague, where he would be running a division of Europe’s fastest growing IPTV provider, is scheduled to have his thirty-fifth interview with the same company tomorrow. But he can only make it if the oil & gas company in Aberdeen can re-schedule his SKYPE interview for a COO position and if the Reuters IT team can put off the launch of the new system he has headed and if the non-profit stops calling to ask for his help with their website and if the darn Cub Scouts would only postpone their Den meeting…

This year, we lost our beloved Betta, Chester, who lasted three years longer than the average fish. We lost relatives and close friends. Cancer, homelessness, unemployment have hit those we love. The riots in Greece have put us on edge.

And yet…

We can’t help feeling full with a roof over our heads, a smile on our kids’ faces, fragrant lemons for picking all over town, the mountains beckoning and our friends calling from around the world.  My book series The Jelly Bean Chronicles continues to entertain kids and their parents.

All in all, we’ve felt empty and we’ve felt full this year. But one thing is for sure: our glass has not yet been dry. May 2011 be a year of comebacks. Heck, Sarah Palin came back. Eliot Spitzer has his own show on CNN. Even the iPhone 4 came back with a better version.

Wishing you and yours a very happy New Year.