I was Bullied for Being An "Old" Student!

Well, at 53, I am an "old" student. But to actually have my age be thrown in my face by a fellow student was a real eye-opener. I guess it had to happen, right? Grad school. Boy. And to think, tonight's class had to do with Anti-Bullying rules and practices!

So it all started when I signed up for a group project on the topic of Instruction in Multilingual Classrooms. Something I know a little about -- well, the instruction in multi-lingual settings, at least, is what I've been doing most of my career. I was excited at the prospect of working in a group with Teach For America Corps members (which all but one other classmate besides me was) and was looking forward to their first-hand accounts of teaching for the past year in urban settings. At first, no one else signed up for this topic, so I figured I would end up doing a research project on a subject of lesser interest to me. Then, just when it looked like the topic was a "dead"one, two members of the class signed up.

The first time we sat together, in the following week's class, I noticed the "death to white women who don't understand Latinos" attitude on the other. My red buzzer was screaming in my ear. "Bad idea!!" it shouted. "Change teams," it urged me, yet I didn't. I thought perhaps my gut was wrong and I was just overreacting.

Trust the gut.

Sadly, it was correct. But it took me six weeks, two no-shows to group meetings, countless emails unanswered, no comments, suggestions or re-writes on numerous drafts of topic points, refusal to work on a timeline or commit to doing research to understand that this girl and I were not in the same league. Not on the same team. Not even in the same time zone (philosophically speaking). So when she told me this evening, ten days before a presentation and thorough research paper were due, as I asked her if she had her section done (as she had committed to having it done by this evening) that I was "freaking out" "too invested in the project" and "old, " I got pissed off. When she incredulously told me I was disrespecting her, I stared at her incredulously, ready to simply walk away. When she went on to say it was my "choice to have kids so maybe you shouldn't be doing this," I went ballistic. No one crosses that line. The good thing about being "old" is you can easily separate bullshit from reality.

I then did something I have never done: I quit the team. The professor offered me the ability to write up my own research paper, in lieu of doing the presentation, which is alright, although disappointing.

Then I realized my quitting was one of the first proactive acts of self-preservation I have committed in many, many years.

So "bully" to being old I say. (But if she dares use any of my material, I'll get her for plagerism!)